Antique Man

Today, Monday, I went to the local coffee shop in Knoxville, IA because Shararose went to work. (I was visiting the Fishes this weekend)
I went in, ordered a Rasberry latte, and sat down with my overloaded, manly looking Swiss gear book bag. I always enjoy going to places by myself, especially out of town. There is a nice feeling to be lost in the crowd. To sit down in a place where no one knows you or anything about you. You are just you.

After working a couple hours on my internship stuff I decided to visit the local antique shop. Shararose and I had gone during my first visit to Knoxville and spent a good deal of time trying on hats. The owner was so nice. He took a picture of us each wearing a hat and printed off two copies. As we left he walked outside, cigar in mouth, and bid us goodbye with a smile.

I felt compelled to go back and look at the hats, but it was more an excuse to see this older gentleman again. I prayed that God would use the opportunity for me to share my faith. It was a bit awkward going by myself to try on hats. I walked in and he came around the corner not immediately recognizing me. "Anything I can help you with?" he asked with a big smile. I wondered if I was his only customer all morning. "Well, I just came to look at your hats," I replied. He walked back with me and remained standing in the doorway to the hat room. I felt a bit uncomfortable, but he left for a bit. I proceeded to pick up hat after hat and he would proceed to return and make small talk. I seem to pick up awkward experiences wherever I go. But the last time he came back to see how I was doing the conversation went deeper.

"My late wife was the one who was good at picking out antiques that would sell. I'm afraid I don't have that knack. A woman's eye for things is just different." And we began to talk about his family, how she had a stroke and during the same year her son had a brain annurism. He would visit her in the nursing home for 3-4 hours, but a couple years later she passed. The pain in his eyes was blatant, and I was worried he might cry right there. After sharing this part of his life he said, "Well, I'd better leave you alone to finish looking."

I picked out a hat for my sister Maria (we drink tea and wear hats) and went up to pay. He gave me a discount and as he was getting my change I said, "I know that this is a random question, but what is your name. I'd like to write it down in my little black prayer book and pray for you." He turned around and looked very perplexed. "Well, here's my business card," he said as he handed it across the desk. "Is there anything specific I can pray about?" I asked. He had gotten very awkward and uncomfortable. "No." Then silence. So I wrote down his name. Then paused, neither of us were saying a word...just standing there, and I assure you I felt extremely uncomfortable. But I believe God wants me to feel uncomfortable so that He can work.

Finally I said, "Look, I know you don't know me well, but I just have had it on my heart to ask if you have a relationship with God." And his face grew redder and redder. It seemed out of anger, but I couldn't be sure. "I guess you could say I have a casual relationship. I like to go in the woods and talk to Him, but I'm not a Bible thumper or anything like that." I nodded. He kept talking. "Look, I guess I believe in God but I don't have a relationship. Honestly I was very angry with Him for taking my wife and couldn't understand how her son could die in the same year as her stroke..."

"I understand that it would be natural to feel that way. I'm very sorry that happened," I replied. To summarize the rest of the conversation I ended up sharing with him why I wanted to ask him if he knew God well, and told him I wasn't offended that he didn't agree. But in the process of telling him how there was a time in my life when I had no hope I started crying! Ahhh, I don't know what's wrong with me at times. "I'm not crying because I'm sad." I told him. "I'm crying because if I didn't have hope in God and His word I probably wouldn't be here today because there was a time in my life when I wanted to kill myself. It wasn't until I turned back to God that I found real joy and meaning. And so that's why I hope you can find that someday too. I'm not asking you to agree with my beliefs, but I do think you and I have a responsibility to really seek the truth. To find out if there is truth to the Bible. Because if there is and we're not following it then we're in trouble."

While I shared with him his eyes grew watery; I have no idea what was going through his mind. He told me to stop by again when I was in town next, and I'll be praying for him until I do. Will you pray for him also? The antique man? I learned through this experience that sharing the gospel is embarrassing and awkward and not smooth at all, but that it's okay. I felt ridiculous crying in front of this man I'd only met for the second time, but I hope he saw the depth to those tears. The truth to my hope in God. He'd told me earlier that I had a wonderful smile, and I told him before I left, "I want you to know my smile is only wonderful because I truly have something to smile about. Something more than material, family, or friends. Something lasting and outside of this deteriorating world." (Though I'm sure it didn't come out so smoothly).

Whether an antique shop or porn shop or gas station there are people waiting to hear.
It's not our responsibility if they accept, but it is ours to tell.